THE MONOGAMIST

"....while for me the idea of seeing another man would be like trying to fit another outfit into an already over-stuffed suitcase, Big was happily dating another woman like it was the most natural thing in the world. Is it that men have an innate aversion to monogamy, or is it more than that? I wondered in a city like New York, with it's infinite possibilities, has monogamy become too much to expect?"
-- quote from Carrie Bradshaw Season 1 Ep.7: The Monogamists

I happened to be watching the Sex & the City reruns days back and bump into this particular episode about monogamous relationship. Surely, I don't live in New York city and am not involve with a man like Mr. Big but that episode really got me thinking: In this world where everything's possible and new things pop up almost every minute, has monogamous relationship REALLY become too much of a thing to handle? And, I mean, has monogamy become a burden to the creatures who hailed from Venus?

The issue about guys refusing to commit has long been buried in the ancient relationship bible. Come on, when was the last time you heard about guys refusing to commit himself into a serious relationship? Loong enough that I can barely remember.

But when was the last time you heard about a breakup that was initiated by the girl?
Recent, huh?

The issue now is that girls are no longer relenting themselves into a monogamous relationship. At least not at the age when it is too soon to settle down. Girls are hating the idea of finding Mr. Right too soon. In fact, it is not feasible to even go in depth a relationship for fearing that you will realise he is Mr. Right but the timing is all wrong. Then the ultimate decision strikes: either give up your desire explore and settle with your so-called Mr. Right or take the risk of giving him up in return for the hope that there are better fishes in the pond.

Make up a situation: You know this great guy and then starts to think that he is the one. In fact you got so confident about it that you begin telling your friends, your family, your besties that you think this is it. Have a honeymoon period, then reality sets in. You don't fit well together, your perception about the future goes in opposite direction. Then you realise everything that you thought was love initially are only a mere illusion and infatuation. You are back at square one again....either give up all your hopes about finding another better love and settle OR break off and start the hunt again.

Perhaps that is the dread that every girl are trying to prevent themselves from getting into. But face it, most girls have had an experience in a serious relationship that spans on for years and breaking if off after that. It has become an ultimate big NO NO in the dating bible. Getting into a relationship too soon and you face the risk of falling apart. Else, take the risk to explore, fall and learn before settling only with the best or nothing at all.

In a big city where there are countless possibilities hidden at every nick and corner of the streets, it has become ultimate that there is only one thing a girl should avoid: the decision to enter into a monogamous relationship.

If trying to fit another outfit in an already over-stuffed suitcase seem like an impossible thing to do, then consider carrying an empty suitcase with the hope that you will pick up some outfits along the way and then settle with the combination you are most comfortable with.

PARTY GUEST 2: What about you guys?
CARRIE: I'm not dating anyone.
PARTY GUEST 2: And what about you Miranda, seeing anyone special?
MIRANDA: Actually no but I am seeing a whole bunch of unspecial guys. That's one of the requirements to date me. Are you special? Sorry! Move along...but if you have any unspecial friends could you give 'em my number. I'm serious do any of you have a completely unremarkable friend or maybe a house plant I could go to dinner with on Saturday night?
PARTY GUEST 2: She's hilarious!

(Sex & the City S4 Ep.1: The Agony & the Ex-tacy)

Yes hilarious....but she's right...

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AND FINALLY.....


the long wait is over.....Sex & the City: The Movie is gonna be released June 5 in Australia. OMG....can't wait already.....because it is nice to know that Carrie's journey of manhunt has finally come to an end....